warriorscribe | Snowblind Inbox

yo enoch
whenever you stop being dead you better not pull that morgue experiment or i am going to flip a shit
just please come back
way too many people died from that experiment and for other reasons besides
and house lost his jackass filter so hes being even worse than usual about all of it
trying to encourage people to do more crazy experiments
i dont even know if you are back or when you will be but
its day 256 now
and tomorrow my group is going to try to open the sealed building
i dont know if it will work or what we might find if it does
so if you come back then and i dont answer that might be why
i dont know yet
just come back and stay safe
were going to try to be as safe as we can with this too

"Flip a shit", what a colorful phrase. I'm afraid you're too late on the warning. I had to try. I failed to save Beckett's life. I had to do something or it would mean nothing, if I did not at least find an answer for him and for all of us. Unfortunately these horrid machines in our veins had other ideas and forced me out. I've had enough of my body only being mine when they say so.

Are you all right? What happened? What did you try?

[Davesprite doesn't answer until evening, after the experiment has finished and his group is safely inside somewhere. He near has a heart attack at Enoch's message, until he reads further and sees that he's safe.]

jesus fucking christ enoch
dont do that again
you testing the limits of the revival system is the last thing we need when there were eleven people on the obituary list yesterday

[He takes a moment to calm down a little.]

were fine
i managed to get the chips from my busted tablet by just leaving them alone after the first time we got paralyzed
i grabbed them in the morning
house told me to try and see if anything would happen at the sealed building in reaction to them so i waved them around and slapped them on the outside and stuff and said hey open up
but nothing happened
were in the bus stop beside it now

It's always seemed there's something behind those drawers when House and others have locked themselves in. If it is where we are treated, resuscitated, I had to see for myself if he was or had been revived. If I could help bring him back it would make up for my failure to prevent his death, and if not that it may have told us something about the process we need to know.

I'm tired of being helpless, Davesprite, I'm tired of being unable to even atone for my failings. I would never forgive myself if I could have done something and did not. I'm glad you and your companions are safe, though I wish they had been the key, but you broke yours, as well? It wasn't only Beckett who decided to break his tablet? I woke to find the parts scattered on the floor and a cloaked figure attacking him. I had no idea anything more was happening.

thing one house is back
he came back two nights ago and hes being even more of an asshole than normal
and thing two this was a whole organized thing
there were a bunch of people that were part of this
and a bunch of them died in the process
quark and kunsel tried to hack stuff while it was going on and both got injured when their tablets exploded
quark worse
though watson should be with him now helping him out
rhys did some hacking stuff too and got choked but hes alive
but listen enoch
people keep telling me they feel like they failed with this or didnt do enough and thats bullshit
i hate that anyone had to die but the response to that is to not try and do something that will get you killed again
you cant just think youre not good enough because this didnt magically solve everything
this place is complicated
its always going to be complicated
and we did learn some things this time
part of the lesson is try to be more careful next time
and for the love of fuck try to stay alive
can we just stop having people throwing themselves into death
ive got so many dead friends already who havent come back without you or anyone else tempting whether fate will add you to the pile

[Davesprite has given him a lot to think about, and, therefore, a lot to say. Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately), fingers are slower than mouths, so the response is a disjointed series of replies as his mind moves on to the next thing before he's done typing his reaction to the previous.]

That's unfortunate, I seem to be unable to tolerate House as he normally is.

Quark was injured? Is he going to be all right? I'm speaking with him, too, I need to ask him.

[And he immediately goes back to his own post to do that. The rest will have to be a delayed reaction after he comes back to read over the rest. He can only type one thing at a time...]

like i said watson was going to meet with him
he said they were close enough that he could be there by the end of the day
but any medical specifics are beyond me
dont ignore the rest of what i said either enoch
i meant it

Edited 2017-07-08 18:35 (UTC)

I'm not ignoring it. I can only respond to one person at a time and I had to hear it from Quark himself, that he's been treated. There's no guarantee Watson would reach him. Anything could have happened to him along the way.

In any case, it isn't about thinking it would fix everything or win us the town or open all the doors. I was never so deluded as to think this was the answer to everything. It's much smaller and more personal than that, even if it had the chance to be more. I tried to preserve Beckett's life and I did not. If there was any way I could help revive him or learn something for him in exchange, find one of his precious answers on his behalf, or even, in trying to help him, help someone else, I would.

Don't you have people you would lay down your life for, Davesprite? Friends, family, lovers? To me, Beckett is one of those people, and I took the first opportunity to do what I could for him. I know that you don't think so, and that this is upsetting, and for that I apologize, but this attempt to atone for that failure to prevent his death by risking mine was worth that risk.

Again, I don't want to upset you, and I'm sorry. Would that I could simply not say anything of the sort but death has left me without that control.

enoch i would die for my friends if it meant saving them without a second thought
but doing that to save somebody else is different than just throwing yourself into a deadly experiment when theyre already gone

[He pauses here. There's a lot more he could say, but—]

do you want me to stop talking to you
i already dealt with one guy with the same kind of loss earlier today
and you saw how i was when i lost my own filter
i still have a lot of thoughts on this but i dont want to make you spill your emotional guts if youre not comfortable with it

And when there's the smallest chance this deadly experiment may also help speed their revival? As I said, the idea may have been conceived as a test of the morgue creature's perceptions but when I did this I had the lights behind the drawers in mind. I don't fault you for being more cautious. You should be. You're young. Your death means more, is more of a waste. I'm four hundred years old, Davesprite. I've made my contributions to life many times over. It's easier to accept this risk, and easier still for someone I feel so close to.

I will never say you should agree with or, Lord forbid, emulate me. You shouldn't. The standards I hold myself to are for myself alone.

I don't know how long this effect will last. I would rather talk and say too much than isolate myself without knowing when the isolation will end. Isolation brings madness. If you are uncomfortable, however, I will not fault you for not speaking to me.

how the hell was it supposed to speed up his revival
did you think you were going to find fucking narnia dead people edition back there
and just shove their ghosts back into their bodies via the mystical morgue shelves in whatever hellscape you find on the other side
i dont care if youre 400
youre still alive and dont need to fucking throw yourself away on a dumbass experiment that makes no sense in the first place

You keep making these assumptions about what I expect that simply aren't so. I didn't know what I would find, and knew full well it's likely I would find very little, but even so I had to try. There was a chance I could do something, anything. Even the smallest understanding of how it is done could have been useful.

[Unfortunately for Davesprite, he's trying to talk down the man who jumped into a tornado to save a human soul - not even a human, just a soul, who likely wouldn't have been harmed by it in the first place.]

this is so stupid
if youre going to risk your life then risk it for something better than that
you werent going to find anything you were just going to be dead like everyone else whos pulled a morgue experiment
why does everyone keep doing this stupid dangerous stuff
i have way too many friends dead for no good reason and you all just go yeah lets add my name to the pile
just try me admin
or whatever system it is that decides who does and doesnt revive
and you all being so cavalier pisses me off like house keeps saying people will just come back or its worth doing until nobody comes back at all but screw that
i miss my friends enoch
if youre just going to try and kill yourself because you think you MIGHT learn something then fuck off

It was likely. I accepted that. But I'm not trying to die - not without hope of doing something else, at least.

At that moment there was nothing better to risk my life for. I'm tired of my friends dying, too.

I'm sorry. I know I'm upsetting you, and this won't help, but it felt right, even if I know it would feel right for no one else.

[Davesprite pauses here, caught up in his frustration. Arguing clearly isn't working; Enoch's mind is too clearly made up.]

im going to hang up here
if we keep arguing were just going to dig ourselves a circle shaped rut until we have the worlds roundest canyon
and im exhausted already
ill talk to you some other time
just dont fuck die again in the meanwhile

I dearly wish I could say I won't, but all I can truly offer you is I'll do the best I can. We both know the way this place can be. I know it is of no comfort to you but know that I do not seek death for its own sake.

I'm sorry for all of this.

Take care.

just be careful enoch
take care of your own self

[He hangs up here.]

Snowblind Inbox

@featherydouche; text; day 256

Day 257

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