Apprentice Wanted Powers/Regain tracker

[warriorscribe]

Native Spells
-Next Spell: Not apprenticed/following

None

Canon Powers

Outside Enchantment: Blocked Facial Hair Growth - locked
Immortality - locked
Angelic Fortitude - locked
Holy Armor - regained November 2014
Double Jump/Attack Suspension - locked
Purification - locked
Overboost - locked - Uriel not present
Ceta - locked - no catalyst, insufficient ascension

Enchanted Items

Fruit of Wisdom - inert
Indestructible Jeans - active (reactivated October 2014)

Regained Items

None

Native Items

Sickle - a farming implement being used as a weapon
Magically Heated Booty Shorts - a gift from the Harvest Goddess' father. He wears them as underwear when it's cold.
Sheer Shirt - a white sheer shirt that clings to his upper arms and chest to show off his muscle. Made by Kanaya on behalf of a brothel he was staying at at the time.
Shapeshifting Short Robe - a short robe (mid-thigh) bought from Amala resembling the robe he wore in Heaven in its neutral state. In desperation it becomes ragged and tattered, in fear it lengthens to mid-calf and spawns a scarf to hide his face, in love it turns translucent red-white and flowy, in lust it turns thin and almost totally transparent and masks anything worn under or over it, in anger it begins turning black or a deep purple and seems to flare out of its own accord, in sadness it grows to the same length as it does in fear, but it forms a hood to cast a shadow over his eyes.

Comments

Intro: Rosebutt

[warriorscribe]

Enoch had been granted good luck with magical objects and bad luck with names. For the most part, this meant names he'd already learned were slipping from his mind, save ones who had been with him literally as long as he could remember, like Lucifel and Michael. So far, it was fairly untintrusive, and his good luck seemed to hardly be there at all.

All that would change, of course, when a hunting trip brought him within earshot of a pack of fae talking and giggling amongst themselves. Dutifully, he watched the ground as he listened, avoiding any fairy circles as he learned they mostly seemed to be talking about some ridiculous butt plug someone they derisively nicknamed "Rumpy" was wearing.

Looking down making sure he doesn't fall into the fae's traps worked well in his favor, because he found an odd stone on the ground that began producing water when he picked it up. Fresh water. How much easier this would make everything! It wouldn't solve any food problems, but they would always have clean water to clean, cook, bathe with...

"Hey! That's mine!" a voice snapped above him. Enoch raised his head to see a bearded fairy man naked from the waist down, hovering on rapidly-beating gossamer wings. He must have been the person the other fae were gossiping about - sticking out of his ass was a long-stemmed rose, or a butt plug shaped like it, at least. It was even painted to better resemble a rose. Enoch was relieved, now that he'd seen it, that it didn't have thorns.

He was so distracted by the bizarre sight that he didn't realize "Rumpy" had noticed where his eyes were and was smirking. The smirk was gone when Enoch refocused on his face.

"Tell you what, kid, I'll let you have it on one condition: guess my name."

How lucky, he thought. He'd heard the gossip before, so he had at least part of his name! Except now that he needed it, he couldn't seem to remember even that. "R...ah...Ru..." Spurred on by the reflexive raised eyebrows from the other, he tried to remember the rest of the nickname, hoping he might stumble on the truth, but his mind was a total blank. "Rufus?" he finished lamely.

The fairy burst out in raucous laughter, doubling over midair. "Wow...for a second I thought you knew! Nope!" A wave of his hand, and the stone Enoch held was suddenly in the other man's hand. "But you know, at least you got the first syllable right, sort of. I'll give you a consolation prize!" And then he, and his ridiculously long butt plug, were right in Enoch's face. Enoch leaned back as he continued. "This butt plug! Go on, take it!"

"Uh..." Enoch managed eloquently.

"Yeah, I know, I know. But it's magical, trust me! Take it and see!"

It could be worse, he decided, knowing full well the fae here were often more malicious than this. He reached up to pull the plug from the fairy's ass, and found it came away coated with some sort of clear oil that oozed from the material of the plug itself.

"See? It lubes itself! And your butt too, of course. Isn't that convenient? It's my favorite, and now it's yours!"

Enoch opened his mouth to say he had no use for it, but then he realized while he might not like it, it would be perfect for any number of people in the village - he could sell it and help solve the problem of winter food shortage! "Well, all right."

"It's settled, then!" The fairy beamed widely, backing up to a normal distance again. "But, man, those are some nice pants you're wearing, I'm sorry that-"

Enoch didn't hear the rest of that sentence, his attention utterly commanded by the searing pain in his groin as the butt plug was suddenly no longer in his hand but his butt, and, his jeans being indestructible as they were, didn't rip but were pulled back. He soon found himself curled up on the ground, still groaning in pain, having managed to get his jeans undone and pushed down to his knees, though he couldn't remember actually trying.

"...Well, that was new," said the fairy. "Guess those pants were too nice, eh? Anyway, if you're still with me, it's cursed too! Haha! You've gotta carry it in your butt, that's the catch."

Directing a baleful eye at the fairy from on the ground, Enoch reached back to pull the plug out, only to growl in pain - it felt like it was adhered to him.

"Aaaand, you can't take it out yourself! Welp, that's it, then. Thanks for taking it off my hands, sucker!"

Enoch made a mental note, once the pain had begun to subside, not to ever deal with a fae again.